It Was the Best of Times, It Was the Worst of Times...

The title of this expat blog seems to describe my last two weeks pretty well...

As you know, the best part of being an expat is having guests. And we have been very lucky on that front recently! First, my good friend was visiting us. We went shopping, ate breakfast (several times) at Cafe Extrablatt's buffet and just spent time together. Awesome!

And then last weekend, Herr Welle's parents came to visit us. It was nice for Fräulein to be able to spend time with her grandparents. And we visited the Christmas markets both here in Wiesbaden and in Rüdesheim.

But then to the not-so-nice part. First of all, I have had a cough for two weeks now. You know, that kind of dry cough, when it doesn't bother you much when you are awake, but you are not able to fall asleep, because just when you are about to, you start coughing again... And no chance taking any powerful medicine when you are pregnant.

But this Monday was the total low-point (I hope). Since morning, I wasn't feeling too great. Herr Welle was driving his parents to the Hahn airport, so I had to pick up Fräulein from her Krippe with her buggy. Naturally, it was just that afternoon, when it started to snow and it was a bit of a struggle to push the buggy through all that slush.

At home, I felt my temperature rising (and not just because I was unhappy with the situation...). Within an hour, I had +38.5°C fever. I was just laying in the bed under several blankets and asked Fräulein to be very quiet and watch the Moomins. And then I threw up. Twice. Feeling sick is not nice, when you are in your normal condition, but it doesn't make it any easier, when you are 37 weeks pregnant.

The following morning I went to see my doctor. I was told that I was the fourth patient there that morning with the same condition. Apparently, it wasn't a stomach bug as such, but some sort of virus, which caused cramps in the abdomen. Normally, that wouldn't feel too bad, but for pregnant women it was worse.

But the important part was that the baby was fine. And I am starting to feel better, although I'm still coughing.

And I have been able to take part in two of the exams I had scheduled for this autumn, so now I can finally start my maternity leave for real!

Let the Christmas season begin!

*****
Viimeiseen pariin viikkoon on mahtunut niin huippuhetkiä kuin aallonpohjia. Ensinnäkin olemme saaneet nauttia lukuisista (tai no kolmesta) Suomi-vieraasta. Mutta toisaalta myös virukset ovat vierailleet meillä - lähinnä minulla. Ei hauskaa, etenkään raskauden tässä vaiheessa. Mutta nyt alkaa helpottaa ja mammalomakin on alkanut. Joten Joulua odottelemaan! 

Less Is More

I'm not sure how to take this, but it seems that the less I write, the more visitors my blog gets...

The downside of people finding a blog is that you get a lot of junk comments. Therefore, I have had to add the word recognition thing to the commenting part of my blog. I'm sorry for that, as I really love your comments and I'm not happy to make commenting more inconvenient for you.

I'm feeling guilty for not posting here often enough, but I must say that I have really enjoyed my free time. Now that Fräulein is spending about six hours a day in the Krippe (more about that later), I have been able to start the studies, which I had planned for this autumn. That means a lot of reading and listening to the lectures over the web.

Big, heavy books, but I just love them!

Even though the six hours of me-time passes very quickly, I just love to get my thoughts into something completely different. And (I say this although I know you might start to think I'm such a dull person) I just love studying and preparing myself to a test. The first test will be next week and I just can't wait for the feeling which you get after spending four hours writing down everything you have learnt in the last couple of weeks.

Yesterday, I was sitting at Starbucks reading this:
"When you think of being spaces, Starbucks will probably come to your mid.
The coffee chain's stated goal is to become our 'third place',
where we spend the bulk of our time in addition to our home and work."

So try to bear with me - I'm just enjoying the possibility to step out of the Hausfrau mode for a couple of hours each day! :)

*****
Blogini on saanut viime aikoina paljon uusia vierailijoita. Valitettavasti tästä on seurannut, että olen alkanut saada valtavasti roskakommentteja, joiden takia jouduin ottamaan käyttöön kommentoinnin sanatunnistuksen. Pahoitteluni siitä!

Nyt kun Fräulein viettää enemmän aikaa päiväkodissa, olen saanut aloitettua etäopintoni. Ihanaa saada ajatukset johonkin ihan muualle muutamaksi tunniksi päivässä!

Expat Hausfrau's Peek into Local Customs - St. Martin's Day

As an expat Hausfrau, it is sometimes a bit difficult for me to get into the local habits and customs. Fortunately, Fräulein's daycare provides a great connection to German everyday life.

Yesterday, we had the first free-time activity arranged by Fräulein's Krippe. The kindergarten arranged a St. Martin's day procession for children and their paper lanterns.
(I'm sorry for the hideous quality of the photos!)

The small bright spots are the lanterns...

It was already dark at 6pm. when the procession started from Nerotal, so the lanterns looked beautiful. Along the route, there were musicians playing their trumpets. After a short walk, everyone gathered by the local church, where there was a play about St. Martin and some singing.

Fräulein's selfmade lantern

And last but not least, all children got one of these:

It was a great experience not only for Fräulein, but for me, too.

*****
Eilen pääsimme tutustumaan paikallisiin traditiohin, sillä Fräuleinin päiväkodista järjestettiin Martinpäivän kulkue.

Friends, Food And Fun

We really had a great time in Finland. One of the high points was that I actually spent the first night away from Fräulein since she was born!

"She was almost two years old!" I hear you saying. Yes, that's true. But we really had had neither the chance nor the need to do this earlier. 

But now I had a great reason to leave Fräulein with my mother for two days. I was going to meet my friends from the university after a very long time. Yay!

On Saturday morning, I left Fräulein sleeping and took a bus to Helsinki. For the first 15 minutes of the bus ride I felt a bit funny, but after that I was so distracted by the other passengers and looking forward to meeting my friends, that I did not worry about Fräulein at all.

In Helsinki, we ate chocolate for lunch at Chjoko. It was a nice brunch, but having eaten breakfast five hours earlier, I might had been a good idea to eat something 'real' before all the sweet things...

Afterwards, we checked into our hotel suite and, well, what do six ladies in their thirties normally do when they see each other after a long time? :)

We enjoyed dinner at Farang. Now I know the difference between a restaurant and a good restaurant! The food was marvelous and the waiters (which were many!) were genuinely nice and helpful. It was just the perfect way to eat great food and to spend time with a group of friends. Unfortunately I don't have any photos to show you - I was too concentrated in enjoying the company and the food to take any.

Before heading back to our suite, we had some drinks at the lobby bar. But as most of us are mothers of small children, the night ended already at midnight (although there might have been some gossiping talking going on after the lights went out...).

But how about Fräulein? I only sent one SMS to ask how everything was going and apparently she hadn't asked about her mum even once! After some consideration, I decided that was a good thing. Fräulein and her grandmother had spent a lot of time outdoors. And the best part: they had baked buns!

On Sunday morning, I had breakfast with my friends at the hotel and then we all went to our separate ways. I had such a long bus ride back to Western Finland (not to mention the fact that the bus broke down and we had to wait for a replacement), that Fräulein had already waken up from her nap when I got back there. We were both overjoyed at our reunion and she very proudly presented the buns she had baked!

These are the buns Fräulein had baked especially for me and Herr Welle.
Unfortunately there is no cue in this photo to tell you how HUGE they were!

All in all, what a nice weekend for both of us!

*****

Suomi-lomamme aikana vietin ensimmäistä kertaa yön poissa Fräuleinin luota. Tapasin opiskelukavereitani Helsingissä. Kävimme syömässä suklaabrunssin Chjokossa ja illallista Farangissa - molempia voin suositella tämäntyyppisten treffien ohjelmaksi! Pienten lasten äiteinä päädyimme aika ajoissa unille, mutta hyvin saimme juoruttua päivitettyä kuulumisemme.

Samaan aikaan Fräulein nautti äitini täydestä huomiosta. Tyttö ei ollut yhtään kysellyt perääni, enkä ihmettele, sillä Hammu oli keksinyt kaikkea mukavaa puuhaa, kuten pullien leipomista. Sunnuntaina jälleennäkemisemme oli riemukas ja Fräulein esitteli leipomuksiaan ylpeänä. Mahtava viikonloppu molemmilla!

Mixed Feelings

A couple of months ago, there was a big debate in the Finnish media about children's daycare. Apparently, there were parents who took their kids to daycare even when they were on vacation themselves.

I can totally understand the anger this has raised. Why to have children, if you don't like spending time with them?

But now I have started to think, if I am going to do something similar.

I have found a wonderful Tagesmutter (childminder) for Fräulein. We are planning to take Fräulein to this Tagesmutter two mornings and one afternoon per week, ten to fifteen hours per week in total.

The main reason for this is that, we would like Fräulein to learn German, and the younger she starts the easier it should be. I would also like her to learn how to interact with other kids.

Fräulein playing with a friend after the Finnish music group last autumn.

But I must admit, I have also more selfish reasons. Herr Welle works long hours and travels a lot. On weekdays, I cannot really count on him taking care of Fräulein, so that I could have some time for myself. I would really appreciate a few hours to run any errands, have appointments, or just simply enjoy a cup of coffee in peace.

So, am I actually as bad as the parents, who take their kids to daycare on holidays?

I have tried to reason this and have come to the conclusion that I'm not. But even when I feel relieved and happy about this new arrangement, I cannot help feeling a bit ashamed in taking my daughter to daycare, although my "job" is to be a Hausfrau...

We just had the first 'orientation day' today. I'll keep you posted.

******
Joku aika sitten Suomessa kohuttiin perheistä, jotka vievät lapsensa päiväkotiin oman lomasa aikana. Mielestäni se on väärin, mutta nyt minua on alkanut mietityttämään, olenko tekemässä jotain samanlaista. 
Olen nimittäin löytänyt tytölle Tagesmutterin (perhepäivähoitajan), jonka luo Fräuleinin on tarkoitus mennä muutamaksi tunniksi kolmena päivänä viikossa. Tärkeimpiä syitä ovat, että tyttö oppisi saksaa ja kommunikoimaan toisten lasten kanssa. Mutta voin kyllä tunnustaa, että yhtenä etuna on, että näin saan itse arkisin vähän "vapaa-aikaa".
Tänään oli ensimmäinen "sopeutumispäivä". Palaan aiheeseen myöhemmin.

Encounters of an Expat Hausfrau

It is not easy to move to a new place and create new social networks. I have had to do this a couple of times. First, I moved to study in the capital of Finland, several hundreds of kilometers away from home. Then, few years after graduation, I moved again, this time together with Herr Welle.

But what usually makes it easier to adjust, are the groups you automatically fall in to. Like when you start the studies at the university in your twenties, there are a lot of similar people in similar situation. Not to mention all the partying... And when you move to work in another town, you meet all these new faces through your new job. I have been lucky to make some great friends during my studies and in my jobs!

But the start here in Wiesbaden hasn't been all that easy. First of all, there is the language problem. My Deutsch is not strong enough to just casually start chatting with someone. Secondly, there is the problem of being a Hausfrau. Fräulein was born about a month after we moved to Germany, so the first six months went by in a haze and without many contacts with the outside world.

Thankfully, I met the family of Herr Welle's colleague. They are also Finnish and their daughter is 10 months older than Fräulein. Through them, we also found the Finnish church in Frankfurt, which has some activities for families with small children. Last spring, we joined their music group and have been able to spend time with other Finnish families.

In the playroom of the Finnish church,
Fräulein has found some new toys and friends 

Although it is great to meet another Finns, it has bothered me that, due to my poor German, I'm not really able to connect with the locals. When we went to baby swimming, I spoke with the other mums in English. It was great to be able to do that, but quite often the general discussion turned into German and I was not able to follow.

But now I have reached some sort of turning point. Yesterday, Fräulein and I took part in a German playgroup! An hour and a half passed, and I didn't ask anyone 'Sprechen Sie Englisch?'. Although I might not have been very chatty, I managed to follow the conversations and even answer some questions in German. Yay!

I was quite exhausted afterwards and I do admit that my German was faaaaar from perfect, but it was a start. I do believe that it will get easier with some practice. Although I'm not sure what I am going to say there next Monday, as I have already used all the phrases I know in German: "Sie heißt XXX", "Sie ist fünfzehn Monate alt", "Wir kommen aus Finnland"...

No Sick Leave For Hausfrau

As I told you yesterday, I fell ill on Sunday morning. Not nice. Especially not nice, when you have a 14-month-old to look after. They do not grant sick leave for SAHMs (= Stay At Home Mums, an acronym I learnt recently!)

Fortunately, I'm feeling a bit better now, so I had to spent only two days curled up on the sofa. Well, I would have liked to curl up, but whenever I was able to find a position in which I wasn't feeling too bad, our daughter, let's call her Fräulein from now on, came and took my finger, pulling me to join her games. You cannot tell a 14-month-old that mummy is not feeling good, so could you please read some books by yourself...

I sometimes wonder, what I have actually been doing all day, when I've spent the day home together with Fräulein. But now that I have not been able to do anything at all, I notice how quickly the toys take over the floors, kitchen table tops pile up with dishes and bathroom floor is covered with laundry, as it cannot fit into the basket anymore. All this in just two days! So, I must be doing something, as our apartment does not normally look like this. (Those who have visited our home know that our home in by no means clinically clean, but looks like someone is living there, to put it mildly... But after two days of doing nothing at all, this really is something else!)

I must say my thanks to Herr Welle, who was supposed to fly to Finland on business yesterday evening, but postponed his departure until tonight. He has made sure that we have something to eat and can actually fit into the kitchen. And today I have finally been fit enough to wash some laundry myself. Although checking the winter sales here in Wiesbaden has to wait until a later date.

2011: The Year Frau Welle Found Social Networks

Tomorrow is the New Years Eve, so guess this could be a good time to look a bit backwards and what has happened during the year 2011. Yes, I'm embarrassed to admit that this all took place this year and not ten years earlier, as it should have with any normal person...


In February 2011: Frau Welle joined Facebook.
Before, I was such an anti-Facebook type of person. I had sworn that I would never join. But never say never...
Being a Hausfrau and an expat made me realize that I need every possible communication channel in order to keep in contact with also other people than my closest friends and family. So I ate my words and joined Facebook.

During my almost-a-year in Facebook, I have had the ups and the downs. First, I became addicted to it. Then a bit bored. Then I was mad, because the privacy settings were changed without me knowing. Now my relationship with Facebook is more neutral. It is nice to follow what people are up to, but I haven't had the energy to connect with all possible people I know and thus have only a handful of Facebook friends to follow.

In November 2011: Frau Welle started blogging.
I guess you have noticed that...

For almost two months now, I have been writing about my life as an expat and a Hausfrau. It has been great to connect with other expat bloggers and noticing that some of my posts can actually be of help to someone!

Hausfrau's new favorite hobby!

In December 2011: Frau Welle joined Twitter.
I realized, that many of my fellow bloggers are very active also in Twitter, so I had to join as well. I haven't yet tweeted (is that the word you use?) at all, but I'm starting to get the hold of things.

Let see what year 2012 brings along!

The Best Part of Blogging

The combination of being a Hausfrau and an Expat is not the best possible, if you are trying to create a new social network. Even though I have made some good friends here, it is always nice to meet new people.

So, the best part of blogging...

...is getting to meet other bloggers!

There are quite many expat bloggers in Germany and even here in Wiesbaden. Last week I was lucky to meet one of them, Frau Dietz. What a great person! I can warmly recommend her blog, especially her post about the beer calendar. Wonderful idea! :D

Frau Dietz invited me to the Christmas Market Meetup with other bloggers from this area. The meetup was yesterday and I was sure to participate, even though the weather wasn't the best for drinking Glühwein outside...

The meeting got a bit smaller than planned, but besides us two Fraus, also German Gems and Shoegirl were there. How nice to meet these new people! Even though I have been blogging only for a month and a half, they really made me feel welcome.

Unfortunately, Herr Welle was traveling on business (what a surprise...), so I had to take my daughter with me to the meetup. It was getting close to her bedtime, so she was a bit restless. And as she is now able to walk (now steady enough in outdoor clothing, too), it is not possible to keep her sitting in her push-chair, if it is not moving.

Luckily, German Gems brought also her husband along. He instantly connected with my daughter. And while I was enjoying the Glühwein with the other bloggers, these two walked around the Christmas market. The little girl hurrying around with a big grin on her face, the tall man following with a stoop while holding the girl from her hood. Back a forth, back and forth. What a great sight!

When we got home, my daughter was so hungry because of the exercise that she ate more evening porridge than she ever has! After her bath she was very tired, but was not able to fall asleep, probably because of all the excitement (and all that porridge). But then she slept like a baby until morning!

I'm starting to think that blogging is the Hausfrau's New Favorite Hobby!

Ready, Set, Go!

My daughter has find her a new favorite way to pass time. She takes my finger and walks me through our long hall back to our study. There she pulls me down and indicates she wants to tumble with me. I guess she got this idea, while her grandma was visiting us. The guest bed is not there anymore, but we do the tumbling on the carpet.

After she is finished with this, she goes to the door on all fours and looks over her shoulder. She has this 'are you ready for a challenge' expression on her face. Then we race back to the living room crawling, both of us.

This can be done SEVERAL times a day.

Let me add that the hall is quite long and there are stone tiles on the floor.

The result? Well, the competition is usually quite tight, but more visible result can be found in my knees...

Being a Hausfrau can be quite painful ;)

A Devoted Hausfrau (Or Not)

My husband loves the Kellogg's All Bran breakfast cereals and he used to eat those for breakfast daily when we still lived in Finland. They don't sell those regular ones in our local Rewe grocery store, but only ones with something with them, like apple. When the Finnish Fathers Day was approaching, I thought I would find him his favorite cereals.

On the Kellogg's web site, I found out that All Bran Flakes are sold in an Edeka store, which can be found in Sonnenberg part of Wiesbaden. On Friday before the Fathers Day, I drove with my daughter to Sonnenberg. But as it was early Friday evening, I couldn't find any place to park my car. After cruising around for twenty minutes, I gave up. (Not so devoted Hausfrau, I might add. If I were, I would have parked the car in the city center and walked the couple of kilometers to the store with my daughter in her push-chair.)

Yesterday I thought I would have another try. We drove back to Sonnenberg and found a place to park quite easily. We went into the Edeka store, which was right by the parking area. But it turned out to be a drink store, which - funnily enough - sold also pet food, but not any breakfast cereals.

Edeka Wein & Getränke (and pet food)

The well-hidden real Edeka store

After looking around the parking lot a bit more, I noticed the real Edeka. At this point, I should have known that there wouldn't be the right breakfast cereals in the store, not after all that trouble. And there wasn't. All I learnt was that All Bran Regular is totally different product from Dayvita All Bran Flakes... The first is what I was looking for, the latter what they had in the store. And if you are wondering about the difference: the latter has yoghurt flakes mixed with the regular ones. Those they sell in Germany. The plain flakes they don't.

So, I bought the yoghurt ones, even though I think they sell those in our local Rewe, too. If, and I emphasize the IF, I were a devoted Hausfrau, I would now open the box and separate the regular flakes from the yogurt flakes. But I guess I'm not and I'll do what I always do: go shopping online. But it isn't as easy as one could think. As the All Bran Regular isn't sold in Germany at all, they cannot be found in any online store, either. I only found them in one Swiss online store (because those are sold in Switzerland!), but they do not deliver abroad.

Yes, I know, I know, my husband has managed well without these breakfast cereals for over a year now (well, he eats those whenever he travels to Finland), so I guess he'll manage without them in future, too. But I must admit, this has become a bit of an obsession for me. And it is so difficult for me to admit that there is something I cannot (or it is much too expensive to) buy online!

Other things I haven't found in local stores and miss from Finland:
- Irish or British cider (please, tell me, if you know where to buy a bottle of Strongbow or any other brand in Wiesbaden!)
- Fazer chocolate
- Twinings Earl Grey Green Tea
- good, fresh fish
- frozen potato products other than French fries

and, like all Finns who live abroad, I must mention:
- rye bread and

- salty liquorice

Hausfrau's Identity

On our second day in Wiesbaden, in autumn 2010, we went to open German bank accounts. I was officially on summer vacation but would start my maternity leave in couple of days. However, I was still pretty much in 'work mode'.

In opening the bank accounts, the bank clerk filled the system database with our personal information. When he came to the part of my occupation, he looked at my baby-belly, and stated: "Hausfrau". I looked at him in confusion. Yes, I was going to be home for a while with the baby, but I didn't feel is was my 'occupation'.

Quite a big part of how I see myself has been built during the years in university and at work. So, this new 'job title' caused a bit of identity crisis for me. I had prepared myself on becoming a mother, but 'Hausfrau' indicated something else. In English, the term is quite similar, 'housewife', but in Finnish we say 'kotiäiti', literally 'home-mum'.

It has now been about 14 months since the incident in the bank. I have kind of adapted to this new role, although I still feel more familiar with the term 'home-mum' than with 'Hausfrau'. And if someone now asked for my occupation, I would still give the title of the job, which I have waiting for me back in Finland...

But I want to make something clear here. Even though I have struggled a bit with this Hausfrau identity, I in no means want to downplay this occupation! It just doesn't feel like 'me'. And I must acknowledge that it is great that in Germany this kind of occupation exists. In Finland, the bank clerk would have asked about my education or my 'real' employment, as being home would most likely be a temporary thing. Or if I hadn't had any job to go back to, he would probably had marked down 'unemployed'.

And being a Hausfrau is most certainly a full-time job!

Hausfrau and her baby exactly one year ago

Hausfrau's Favourite Hobby: Online Shopping

The world of online shopping has opened up for me since we moved to Germany and had a baby. First of all, the selection in German online stores is so much larger than in Finland. Secondly, shopping is so much cheaper here. The sales are better, plus the delivery is usually free! DHL brings the shopping to your door possibly as fast as the next day.

I'm not a real fan of shopping clothes for myself online, as I'd like to try them on. But for baby clothes as well as other accessories, online shopping is a great option.

I must admit that I have even become a bit of a maniac in finding the cheapest offer. In choosing a product I might visit several 'real' stores, but after that I take the shopping online. For example, after choosing the pushchair I wanted, I spent quite a while online searching where I could get it the cheapest (one year ago Bugaboo Cameleon was cheapest in Dutch Mutti und Ich store, even with the delivery costs).

Another nice thing in online shopping are the Gutscheins (discount coupons). Every time you order something, you are provided with several coupons to other stores. And you would be a fool not to use them, right? ;)

I won't even start to list the online stores, which I visit regularly, but I think there are a couple worth mentioning:

• Baby Markt: for anything baby-related. Very reliable and the delivery is free in Germany for orders over 20€. And if you'd like to order something that costs under 20€, add a Pampers packet to your Warenkorb ('Baby Markt macht den besten Preis!') and your order will be delivered free of charge!
• Buch.de: Good selection of books in English and always free delivery
• myToys.de: good selection of toys always in sale
• There are several nice online stores for baby clothes, but one that I have used a couple of times is Ellerhop. I had thought I'd need to wait until January to get winter clothes with good price, but they already had the lovely Cupcake snowsuit in sale. 

If you still aren't convinced or if you need to explain your hobby to someone, please remember that online shopping is a great way to learn a language!

A Bit of History

Welcome to my new blog!

I've been thinking about sharing my thoughts in a blog for a while now. After my good friend started to publish a blog of her own, I have also begun to think in a 'blog format'. So, lets try how this works out!

In order to get started, I guess I should share some background information about how a Finnish mum ended up in Germany. In the beginning of autumn 2010, I was still working in Finland with my big baby-belly. My husband, Herr Welle, was about to start working as an expat in Wiesbaden, Germany in a couple of weeks. We had booked a transportation company to move our home to the new country, even though we still didn't have a new address... A week before the transport company came and packed our belongings, we had finally rented an apartment and I had started my maternity leave with one thing less bothering my mind.

So, in the last possible week, when I was to be accepted into an aircraft, we flew to Frankfurt airport, took a taxi to Wiesbaden and settled in a hotel to wait for the moving truck. Within 6 weeks from our arrival, we had (almost) settled into our new home and our family had grown with a new member - the sweetest little baby girl.

In my blog, I plan to share what has happened after these great changes in our lives, my thoughts about moving abroad, starting family life with new baby, and any everyday thing we will face while living in this beautiful city. I hope I could be of help to anyone facing the same situation, or at least entertain my family, if they are the only ones reading this blog ;). Please, leave a comment and let me know what you would like to read about!

Freundlichen Grüßen,
Frau Welle
(PS. I apologize for my poor English, but I'll use this language so that I could reach other foreigners living in Germany. And my German is even worse than my English!)